A Little Christmas: Ajay's Secret

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Groggy, Ajay squinted at the clock, lamenting the hour. Three AM, the witching hour, but the way he felt tonight, it should have been known as the twitching hour, or even the itching hour, as in itching to get laid. Groaning, he shoved the blankets down past his waist so he could touch his aching cock and feel it throb at even the lightest stimulation. Moaning, he did it again, running the pads of his fingers along the shaft, keeping it light, almost teasing, until all he wanted was to come. In the battered crate that served as his bedside table, he had lube and a collection of colorful vibrators, which he’d been using over the last three months of this unexpected dry spell he’d found himself in. Just thinking of it made his stiffy lag a little, so he shoved the thoughts from his mind and reached for a fat blue silicone cock that always filled him beautifully.

 

Unlike Henry. The fucker. Bastard extraordinaire.

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Thinking of him made Ajay’s cock droop more, especially when images of their last time together flashed through his mind.

 

That’s right, take it!

 

A hand slapped his ass as Henry thrust into him, slapping his other ass cheek before grabbing a fist full of Ajay’s hair and yanking his head back. Henry’s enthusiasm didn’t make up for his short, stubby dick not hitting any of the right places, which wouldn’t have been an issue if Henry actually made an effort to get Ajay off too, but all it felt like was Henry using his body for his own pleasure while slapping Ajay’s hand away every time he reached for his cock to give himself some relief.

 

That belongs to me, boy! Henry snapped while thrusting faster. I dictate when and if you get to come.

 

Those words should have been the tipping point into ecstasy, but Henry was such a pretender, there was no more denying that what he thought he was doing for Ajay wasn’t enough anymore.

 

He’d wanted Henry to give him what he needed, every part of it, including the comfort, cuddles and care he’d desperately craved, but the one time he’d slipped up and muttered the word Daddy at him, Henry had gone still and sanctimoniously declared that he wasn’t down for taking care of anyone but himself. He’d gone on to inform him that if Ajay was looking for that kind of a relationship, he was barking up the wrong tree. He’d harped about Ajay’s lack of a proper job, his unconventional lifestyle, and the way he lived with his ragtag collection of friends in the ‘flop house’ they rented from one of the little old ladies they ran errands for.

 

They took care of her lawn, her little garden, and repairs around her home, in addition to escorting her grocery shopping, where they handled the cart and retrieved everything she needed from the shelves. They maintained her vehicle too, making sure all of the fluids stayed at the correct levels, and clearing it off when winter storms buried it in snow. Angel even cooked her meals when she was under the weather, and she and the ladies she played cards with several times a week, were forever sending over cakes, cookies, casseroles, and a wide variety of soups.

 

Millie and the other ladies called them their guardian angels, and anytime they needed anything at all, they rang, knowing Ajay and his friends would take care of it. This time of year, when walkways and driveways were constantly being pelted with snow and freezing rain, Ajay and his roommates visited them often, shoveling, salting, and picking up whatever they needed so they wouldn’t have to go out. Ajay had even found himself learning about the different types of fabrics and yarns, since several of the women knitted and sewed. It made it easier to ensure he got the selections right the first time, rather than screwing it up and having to make several trips back to the fabric store in order to get what it was they needed.

Maybe it was out of the ordinary, but he loved his extended family, his freedom, and their lifestyle, though in this moment, his memories were doing nothing to maintain the arousal he’d previously felt.

 

He’d ended things with Henry not long after that night, but what hadn’t ended was his hesitation to bring anyone new into his life. His trust had been shaken badly, and every time he looked at a potential partner all he could think about was how horribly mistaken he’d been in choosing Henry and how he couldn’t be certain he wouldn’t fuck up as badly again.

 

Sighing, he felt the silicone beneath his fingers, but he wasn’t hard anymore. Like anytime he thought of Henry, the mood had shifted to something irritating and melancholy, hardly the mindset he needed to be in to pleasure himself.

Great, another night of going unfulfilled because of Henry, and just when he thought he’d gotten beyond this shit. With a furious swipe of his arm he sent everything crashing off the edge of the bed, vibrator, lube, and something that jangled loudly when it hit the wood. Scrambling, he found the pull chain on the lamp, the soft glow illuminating things enough for him to see the worn dog tags lying there.

 

Jimmy’s.

 

Fuck.

 

Now that was a memory he really didn’t need tonight.

 

His brother’s laughter echoed though his mind, those vivid blue eyes alight with joy as he told Ajay about the puppy one of the men in his unit had found, and how he’d taken to carrying it around in his rucksack with its head poking out through the hole in the top as it yipped at everyone. Jimmy’s hands when he’d spoken had moved with animated gestures, fast, furious, and never failing to nudge or reach out to ruffle Ajay’s hair despite how many times Ajay had told him to cut it out. His brother had given the best hugs, while his back slaps had sometimes driven the breath from his lungs, and occasionally knocked him off balance. Ajay had lost track of how often he’d complained about Jimmy getting all the height and muscles. He’d always looked up to his big brother, literally and figuratively, but somehow, Jimmy had always twisted it around on him, pointing out that Ajay had gotten all the talent. Still, he found it difficult to see how there was anything appealing in being the scrawny kid with the acoustic guitar.

 

Sliding a hand over his abs he gave a small smile into the darkness, grateful for Angel’s love of the kitchen, ‘cause the man could seriously throw down, but more than that, he knew how to keep fit. He’d taught Ajay how to tone up and stay that way.

Their early morning runs had helped him to find peace when his mind was spireling…just like it was going now.

 

Continuing to lay there in the darkness would only make it worse, so Ajay gathered up his scattered items and placed them on the bed before pulling on a pair of basketball shorts and a t-shirt. Tiptoeing through the house, he did his level best not to wake anyone, only to see a light gleaming from the kitchen, a sure sign that he wasn’t the only one who couldn’t sleep.

 

Brilliant blue hair framed an elfin face and wide gray eyes that appraised him as he slipped into the room where Shanny stood sipping a mug of something he hoped wasn’t coffee. Caffeine and Shanny at this time of night were a combination no one was equipped to deal with.

 

“Can’t sleep, or haven’t been to bed yet?” Ajay asked as he took in Shanny’s haggard features and the way his hand trembled as he brought the mug to his lips.

 

“Just got in,” Shanny grumbled, words punctuated by a loud, jaw-popping yawn.

 

“Wanna go for a run?”

 

Snorting, Shanny shook his head. “Only if you’re up to carrying me home from wherever I pass out on you.”